Days' anatomy

by Tony
For the Week of March 10, 2008
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Days' anatomy
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Salem has a hunky new doctor. During his first day in town, Dr. Dan got to rescue a damsel in distress, pledge his devotion to help save Bo, and establish some roots as Victor's godson.

The Writers Guild Strike forced me to do unthinkable things. I read more. I was extra productive around the house. I actually held conversations with people about things other than what was happening on our favorite primetime shows. It was exhausting, but, since that it's been over for a few weeks and new episodes are set to start airing soon, I can comfortably park myself in front of the tube again now that my daytime and primetime "dance cards" are full once more. Ok, I'll admit it - I watch too much TV.

Like a lot of my friends, I fell onto the "Grey's Anatomy Bandwagon" a few years back. And, since my anticipation level for new episodes is high and Days' has been hospital heavy lately, I figured I'd use it as a convenient tie in this week. Whereas I do roll my eyes quite often at the antics on Grey's, it does have some annoyingly catchy attributes, like, "McLabeling" things.

Let me explain this pop culture phenomenon for those who may not watch Grey's (for those of you who do, you can skip ahead if you'd like. Seriously). To "McLable" something is to simply add "Mc" to the beginning of the word to spice it up. For example, "Jack and Jill went up the hill." That's boring. But try this, "Jack and Jill went up the McHill." That's more like it! Other uses are "McDreamy," "McSteamy" or "McHot" which describes a good looking person, "McBaby" (a baby) or "McDog" ... a dog. Got it? Good! Now that's out of the way, let's talk about Days!

McMystery Illness (Bo)

This week was another depressing one as Bo continued to slip away. Aside from all the great acting, which is plentiful, it's becoming a slow paced, "blah" storyline. It's a safe bet that Bo won't die. Perhaps that's just wishful thinking, but I don't think "The Powers That Be" are really stupid enough to risk a fan revolt by letting Peter Reckell go. Well, you never know, but let's pretend they're not for the sake of argument.

With that said, I think I have an idea that could possibly make things a tad more interesting. Sure, the following suggestion has been done on countless other shows, but, the thing is, it's a safe bet because it works. I'd love to see Lexie and Dr. Dan act as medical super sleuths digging in stacks of musty books and searching databases to discover the cause of Bo's mysterious sickness and find its cure. I think that would add a little seasoning to a bland dish, perhaps, as this storyline needs a little oomph - stat!

McBonding (Hope and Chelsea)

Although these scenes were hardly a focal point, I enjoyed Hope and Chelsea bonding on the pier. With Billie out of town, Chelsea needs a strong mother figure and Fancy Face certainly fits that description. More so, it was nice to see Chelsea included as I often feel she's left out of the Bo/Hope/Shawn D "Family Fun Click." Her and what's her name ... that baby they had ... oh yeah ... Ciara. She should be included more too!

McKnight in Shining Whatever, Dude (Dr. Dan)

So, Salem has a new doctor and resident hunk. During his first day in town Dr. Dan got to swoop in and rescue a damsel in distress, pledge his devotion to help save Bo and establish some roots as he's Victor's godson. And, of course, he was introduced as a world class, top notch surgeon, internist and diagnostician who just so happens to like surfing. I also hear he makes a great smoked cheddar fondue. Ok, I can't back that last part up, but we should place bets now that in the near future there will suddenly be waves at Salem beach. Any takers?

Please note I'm reserving my right to change my mind later ... but so far I'm giving Dr. Dan two thumbs up as he seems to have a lot of potential. If you look up "leading man" in the "Soap Dictionary" he's a pretty close fit at this point. Charming? Check! Smart and wealthy? Check, check! Sensitive, yet strong, witty and sporting a little five o'clock shadow? Check, check, check and, oh yeah, check. Handsome? Check! Single? That's a tentative check as you never know when Days will lay down the "supposed dead wife" or "psycho girlfriend" card. However, Dr. Dan even got to pull out a classic, "leading man" one liner when Chelsea asked if her dad will die. "Not on my watch," he heroically responded. Check! I was waiting for her to suddenly be wearing a sparkly, sequence gown so he could take hold of her and plant a lingering "Hollywood" kiss then shot a bad guy, grab a vine and swing her to safety. Ok, I should really stop watching Action movies before Days.

McLove Triangle? (Dr. Dan, Chelsea and Nick)

Although I feel it's a bit too soon to fully pledge my allegiance to a Dan/Chelsea paring, I did enjoy their scenes together - a lot! I started to ramble about their flirtation, but, by the time I factored Nick into it, I ended up going on a bit longer than I thought I would - imagine that! So, for my "Two Scoops" on a potential Dr. Dan/Chelsea/Nick triangle, feel free to head over to my SoapCentral.com Blog !

McShady's Wake (Max)

I give Darin Brooks a lot of props for his performance this week as Max dealt with his father's death. It didn't help the depression factor that's latched onto Days lately, but he was certainly amazing to watch. The thing is, I like Max as most of the time as he's portrayed as a relatable, goofy pal you'd want to hang out with, but other times I just don't get him at all. The writer's always seem to constantly have him spinning in several directions and he's been reinvented more times than Madonna!

Like this entire page being ripped out of Nick's journal thing - what's up with that? I know Max was sentenced to community service, but did he have to start with cleaning up the grant? And what's with his interest in a grant anyway? He's not in college and he's never been a "scientific" kind of guy. It doesn't make sense, yet it's not all that intriguing. His spontaneous shady streak, like the entire grant storyline, just sort of came out of left field. I don't mind "Grieving Max," but "Shady Max" is a little hard to swallow.

McCompetition (Tony and Morgan vs. Anna and Stephanie)

Let me begin this part by saying, "Wow, time flies!" Just last summer Steph and Chelsea were entering their freshman or sophomore year and now they're already planning for the future. I may be way off base here, but it seems like the writers are pushing for them to graduate soon. On one side of the coin it's sort of nice as I don't know if I could handle a few more years of sorority gatherings and dead rapists in the basement. On the other side if they keep them going at this rate the girls will be elderly by November Sweeps.

Actually, I heard the writers are already planning a spin off series with the sorority gang set in Miami. Southern and Sassy Morgan, Ditzy Stephanie and Sarcastic Chelsea will be sharing a house and, eventually, an elderly Billie will move in to provide colorful stories that begin with, "Picture it, Salem ..." The show's called ... wait ... that's already been done ... Now, I must have woken up on the good side of the bed this morning because I actually don't mind the "Internship" storyline yet. Ok, ok, I should say it was super cheesy that they kept getting calls at the same time. They were like the Three Stooges harmoniously saying, "Hello. Hello. Hello." At least one of them pointed out the absurdity of the synchronized calls. A good save.

With that complaint out of the way, like I was saying, I'm ok with all of this so far. After all, they are college students and they've each been part of some very heavy, depressing storylines lately so it's a nice change of pace. Also, tossing them in with Anna and Tony is a sure fire way to guarantee some laughs (as long as there's no more creepy Morgan/Tony moments)! Chelsea and Stephanie alone have had some pretty good comedic timing so this has all the makings of a light, fluffy, fun storyline. And, it could always be worse and by worse I mean another "Touch the Sky" or "Dead Ford" storyline. And, speaking of worse ...

McBoring (Steve and Kayla)

I love Steve. I love Kayla. I love Steve and Kayla, yet they nearly put me to sleep this week. Thank goodness for Abe popping up now and again to break up the monotony of Steve's erratic behavior. I'm glad that by the week's end Kayla put her foot down and decided to go back to work. She even jabbed him in the broken ribs a little by saying something like, "You have your secrets and I have mine." I'm a full supporter of the Goose and Gander Theory, but it was still a snooze fest.

Seriously, she knows something's up, he knows she knows something's up, so why doesn't he just tell her the something that she suspects so we can all just move on to something a little more exciting, you know? It's frustrating for Kayla, frustrating for Steve and, very, frustrating to viewers. And, umm, I suspect Kayla's going to be a heck of a lot more frustrated when she's dodging bullets because he didn't give her a heads up. For being the "King of Cool," Steve is not living up to that title!

McMental (Ava)

It's ironic, I've waited a long time for a "Steve and Kayla Storyline" and now that it's happening I find the most interesting parts are when they're not on the screen! I still haven't decided if I'm digging this as a whole, but I'm certainly into Tamara Braun! She is so brilliant that once in a while I forgot the horrible thing she's done and almost, almost, felt sorry that she's being locked in a room by "daddy." Granted, I do have a little soft spot for crazy vixens, but she's so deliciously disturbed! Laurisa said it best - Norman Bates meets Hannibal Lector!

Yet, despite my enjoyment of her performance, a small tidbit really troubles me. Ava had the resources to get to Ireland, sabotage a plane, Google "Patch" to find out his real name, take pictures of all of his family and friends and get them developed all while sneaking in and out of her room, but she still couldn't figure out who he's married to. Right. She lost some major obsessive psychopath points in my eyes for that. Moving on ...

Via Steve's conversations with Abe, we got somewhat of a history lesson and learned more about Ava's Mafioso family. Steve explained how he escaped from Stefano for year and that's when he met Ms. McMental Vitali. There were also some faux-flashbacks of them frolicking in a hotel room and a "From Here to Eternity" moment on the beach while they talked about her ruthless "daddy." She also wanted Steve to marry her, but he dodged that bullet (possibly quite literally) by getting out of town. The fact that both Stephen Nichols and Ms. Braun are amazing actors saved these from being totally icky because, again, I'm not sold on this storyline. It just seems too rushed in some respects such as Ava's character development, yet absolutely stagnant in others like Steve's obsessive doting on Kayla without telling her what's wrong.

McDeported (E.J. and Sami)

Gosh, I always hesitate when writing favorably about these two as there's always that huge, lumbering black elephant in the room in the form of what E.J. has done to Sami in the past. With that said, I'm going to go with my gut and say I really enjoyed their scenes this week. I'm not ignoring or forgetting what he did, but I'm merely rolling with the punches and the punches this week were hysterical!

"Ejami" is at their best when they get to squabble and bicker. I loved it when Sami sarcastically quipped, "You're breaking my heart," when he complained about having to get a job. I could watch those two all day as they sort of reminded me of the junior version of Anna and Tony. Sami is feisty and opinionated while E.J. is more laid back, sophisticated and simply enjoys watching her go off in tangents. And, boy, did she throw a tangent when she confronted the government worker who was out to stick it to E.J.! I love it when the "Old Sami" collides with "New Sami" as it results in trouble for anyone in her path.

The only thing about this storyline that is stupid is the storyline itself. I'm far from a "legal eagle," but I've watched enough law shows to know that they really don't have any reasons to kick him out of the country. As pointed out, he's married to an American citizen with whom he shares a child. I learned in Soap Law 101 that's a valid reason for residency. But, if that's not enough, let's talk about his mother, Susan Banks - an American citizen! Ok, furthermore, and I'd have to research this to be 100% certain, but I think at one point John and Kristin Blake's names were on his birth certificate. Hmm, dare I say it? They're both American citizens! Well, technically John isn't as he was born in South America to an Irish mother and an Italian father, but, like the writers do a lot, lets pretend that didn't happen. In closing, I sentence "Ejami" more amusing screen time in a new storyline. I rest my case. Next!

McRemarried (Shawn and Belle)

It was a romantic end to the week for "Shelle" fans as Belle and Shawn reconfirmed their love for each other in a little makeshift recommitment ceremony in the park. It was short, but sweet and resulted in the pair making a huge decision - they're going to sail around the world once Bo is feeling better. It's a nice nod to history, but I'm selfish and would rather see them stick around Salem! Knowing Brandon, Martha and Alina are leaving soon is not helping me get over my "Days' Depression."

McSneaky (Chloe and Philip)

Like many aspects of Days this week, Chloe and Philip seem to be in a "storyline holding cell" and not much progress was made. The biggest shock was finding out Chloe spoke German. Sure, we also learned she threatened to kill Brady after Philip secretly had her conversation recorded and translated, but that was about it. They flirted a bit, fought a bit and threatened each other a bit. Ok, Philip did have one memorable line when he told her that, "He (Victor) doesn't believe you have something to do with it, he believes you have everything to do with it." That was funny, but if you combine their conversations over the last month with new outfits, that pretty much sums up last week for them.

McBenson (Dr. Rolf)

Mad scientist, general lackey and, now, butler? Dr. Rolf certainly has a messed up resume to say the least. Can't blame him, though, I'd rather hang out with NuJohn than spend time in the slammer, but this has all the makings of such a train wreck! A good one that is! And when he told Rolf to get rid of the accent - hysterical! Yet, as funny as this is now, I have a feeling things are going to take a dark turn soon. The Phoenix isn't a patient patient so I'm sure he will rise again soon in some miraculous way to reclaim his fortune and, oh yeah, get a little revenge. I for one already have my tickets preordered for NuJohn vs. Stefano: Live at DiMera Manor!

Extra Scoops

Hot and Not

Hot: The look on Kate's face when Chelsea introduced her to Dr. Dan not once, but twice as her grandma was priceless! You could tell she wanted to reach across the table and choke her. Although Kate is obviously not a typical granny, somehow being called one repeatedly normally doesn't scream "sexy" to potential suitors!

Not: Maybe it's just me, but I was disappointed there weren't any Claire/John scenes this week! Aside from Tony and Anna, those two have been the funniest duo on Days lately. And, knowing she's going to be sailing away soon, our days are numbered for this Laurel and Hardy team's last laugh!

Line of the Week:

"I always thought of you of as the Godfather type," Hope's response to finding out Dr. Dan is Victor's godchild.

Randomness ...

Did anyone else catch Bo calling Shawn D "Sailor Man" this week? What a great blast from the past!

Don't hold your breath, but we may get to see Marlena actually working again soon! It seems like Victor is lining up for an hour on her couch, but I have a sinking suspicion Crazy Ava is going to end up there too!

Did anyone else think it was too soon for everyone to pounce on Caroline for advice and comfort? I know she's tough as nails, but a little time to let her grieve would have been nice.

Parting Thoughts ...

So the countdown is on for Nicole Walker's return to Salem! According to the latest info, she should appear on screen April 2nd. Oh Chloe, you're so going to get it!

So friends and Days fans, I hope you "sprung ahead" this weekend and reset your clocks! That's "Two Scoops" for the week of March 4th, and, as Claire would say, "That's a fact."

As always, thanks for reading!
Tony

Need more Two Scoops? Laurisa and I are always up to something, so make sure to check out our Soap Central Blogs for more ranting, raving and all-out randomness!

Tony S
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Two Scoops is an opinion column. The views expressed are not designed to be indicative of the opinions of Soap Central or its advertisers. The Two Scoops section allows our Scoop staff to discuss what might happen and what has happened, and to share their opinions on all of it. They stand by their opinions and do not expect others to share the same point of view.

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